A Story of Surrender And Redemption

Father,

I walk in misery as I hesitate in my obedience to you. I don’t delight in sin enough to take pleasure but obedience to you seems uninviting. I can’t seem to make myself home in this world, I try and seek you but the haunting of my past stops me from finding refuge in you. I walk aimlessly, I walk restless; I walk, but I walk without purpose. I do not belong to this world nor do I fit in, yet I put forth great effort to prove otherwise.

I have searched high and low for a life of purpose. I have searched for peace, and I cannot find it. I am conflicted and I am wavering in my faith. Look upon me with compassion, My Lord. Listen to the cries of my heart….

My child,

I am here, I come running to meet you right where you are. I hear the cries of your heart. You are weary so come rest in my presence, come sit down at the basin of grace as I begin to wash you and cleanse your from the paths you have traveled and the steps you have taken. I do not require an explanation of your wanderings, just know that I love you. I love you with a love that has no beginning and no end, I love you with a love that is without measure, a love that is unchanging.

Give your heart to me and let your eyes delight in my ways as I begin to reveal myself to you. I extend my unending grace to you and I will begin to remove every spot, blemish, and wrinkle. I will begin to cut away all that is dead and unfruitful. You will feel the sting of my perfect work, but I will not let you decay nor will I let you wither because you will be rooted in me. I will bring you nourishment and I will give you strength as I condition and prepare you for service.

You see, Your life was never your own, for I have chosen you since the beginning of time, I will begin to direct your steps as you go forth and You will be a great extension of my work and I will work through you to bring more into my kingdom. You will remain in me and I will remain in you, I will grant you the petitions of your heart and whatever you ask in my name shall be done. You are pleasing to me and you will bring me honor and glory all the days of your life.

***Inspired by John Chapter 15

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Jesus Wept

The heart of God during this time:  

He knows… He knows and He shares in your heartache, your grief, and in your great pain. 

He weeps with compassion for you, He weeps at the heartbreak and turmoil that illness and death cause, He weeps at your emotional and physical condition, He weeps for the frailty of your emotions. He weeps in all your suffering… 

Release your pain while He embraces you and wraps you in His arms. He sees your tears and In His great love He draws near to comfort you as you struggle to get through the day. He is with you in the midst of all this heartache and all this pain and know that He will bring you calm and a peace that is beyond what your mind can comprehend, a steadfast love that will never fail you, and His tangible presence to assure you that you are never alone. 

“Let me hold you and dry your tears. Feel my love and presence and know that I am with you. Never will I leave you,
Never will I forsake you”